Friday, December 9, 2011

John Knight was dead...

While Kim and I were on our way back from Nashville today I had a nice moment with God that I wanted to share with you.  Kim was busy cooking up shirt orders with her vendor so I was just listening to the radio when "Alive Again" by Matt Maher came on.  As Kim talked on the phone, I just drove and cried because of what God had done in me.  This happens to me frequently while driving so I know other drivers think I must look pretty silly praising God and singing like I'm getting paid to do it.  But I don't care. 

Last Tuesday I wrote about the ups and the downs that we Christians experience.  But what happens if we stay too long in the down period?  Or worse, what if we turn our backs on God when we're in the down period?   Before January of this year, I had allowed myself to reach an all new spiritual low.  I had turned my back on God.  I had turned so slowly, like the hands on a clock, that no one could see me turning.  I had kept God in my rear-view mirror so that I could keep an eye on him to make myself feel better but I had definitely turned my back on Him.   I was more or less spiritually dead and no one knew it.

In January of this year, Kim and I went away for a weekend (after a really big fight) to try to figure out what we were going to do.  After a lot of soul searching and brutal honesty with each other I had to come to grip with the fact that the marriage problems we were having were because I wasn't where I needed to be with God.  That weekend, God "shattered my darkness and washed away my blindness" so that now, I'm alive again. 

I got so emotional today for two reasons.  First, I was soooo happy that God "called and shouted and broke through my deafness" so that I'm alive again.  Second, I was soooo sad that I let God down but more than that, that it took me so long to let Him make me alive again.  I wasted so much time while taking so long to allow God to wake me up.  This song is very dear to me because I can relate so well to being alive again and it always reminds me to "do what ever I have to to break through" to get into God's presence.

Have you ever had an experience like I had today?  Where are you with God today, this very second?  Can you go to bed every night knowing that everything you did during the day was witnessed by Jesus Himself and you have nothing to be ashamed of.  If you did have something to be ashamed of, are you repenting?  I hope so.  If you haven't heard this song, you can visit the link above to listen.

 
God loves you and I do too!

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