My cool daughter Kalli

Four years ago I wrote a blog about my cool daughter Kassi. It's time that I brag on my cool daughter Kalli. In my blog about Kassi, I shared something random that she did.

Kalli lives a life of randomness picking one thing would be difficult. We never know what she is going to say or do next. She constantly makes me smile. Last night, her youth group came over for an end-of-the-year pool party. I was setting next to an adult while Kalli was with her friends. Out of the blue, she came over and started randomly dancing to an 80's tune. Now you have to understand mine and Kalli's random dancing; we act out the song with a dance...a very goofy one usually. She didn't care who was watching, she only wanted to make me laugh.

Kalli is a very pretty girl AND she likes looking pretty. But I love how she still will act like a little girl and get excited over the smallest things. This morning, Kim got up early and decided to wake the girls and take them to the new Waffle House. Kalli (and Kelsi) were so excited, Kim said "you would have thought I took them to Regas". Kelsi is 6 so her being excited about anything is understandable. Kalli is 15 now, she just got excited because it was the fun thing to do. On top of that, she went as-is. She didn't care who saw her. I think it was because she was with her mom who is just as big of a kid.

It amazes me and thrills me how her and her mother have grown so close this summer. Anyone who is close to the Knights know that we have had some family adversity for the past 2 years and it has really been stepped up the past 6 months. Kalli has really stepped in to be a comfort for Kim. Somehow she always knows how to make Kim feel good...to make her feel loved, an extra special mother-daughter love.

Kalli went on a mission trip with her Rio 180 youth group this summer to Panama. Because of the flu outbreak in Panama nothing went as planned. When you are on a mission trip in a foreign country and you don't have an agenda, it can be rough. Kalli didn't complain. There was adversity and Kalli handled it very maturely. All the while, she was doing ministry.

Kim, Kalli, and Kelsi went to Girls camp this weekend with our church and with RIO Central. There were at least 40 kids there and most of the pictures that I saw with Kalli had her sister Kelsi in them too. She is such a good big sister. She has more motherly instincts than many mothers that I have met.

Oh yeah...and she made the Sevier County High School Dance Team this summer. I am so very proud of her and I am very proud to call her my daughter. Kalli and I are alike in many ways and I see a few contentious confrontations in our future but that's OK. Kalli and I are close and we can handle conflict. One of us will win and the other will say she (foreshadowing) is sorry. We'll hug it out and everything will be OK. Then she'll go tell her mom on me :) so she gets more hugs.

I love 'er (inside joke) and I just can't help it.

Thank you God for giving Kalli to Kim and Me.

My 21-Day Fast

I've fasted before but I have never documented my methods, reasons, or results. This is my attempt to document my fast in hopes that it may help someone down the road.

First the reason: why fast?  The Bible is full of examples of fasting, commands to fast, and reason's to fast. If I tried to document the reasons why a Christian should fast we would be here for a long time. Daniel fasted and because of his fast, his prayers were answered. Jesus said certain spirits could only be cast out through prayer and fasting. My interpretation of that is greater power in Jesus.

Fasting works.  Three years ago, I went on a 21-day fast because my dad was diagnosed with incurable cancer. After my fast, I prayed for dad and from that point on, he proclaimed his healing.  His doctors weren't as convinced.  Finally, in July of 2013, Dad's doctor told him he was cancer free.

I am fasting now for a number of reasons. First is because I need to be closer to God, I believe if I fast, I will draw closer to him. Second is for a number of personal needs in my family. And my last reason to fast is because my wife (Kim) is going to.  I want to support her. The fact is it is easier to fast with a partner.

My methods: This fast will last 21 days starting January 4, 2016. I will be fasting meat, bread, and sweets. I will eat bread without yeast or lard (unleavened bread). I do plan to drink flavored water and diet drinks.

For anyone that is tempted to reply with how I am fasting wrong, please just take it up with God and keep it to yourself. I haven't found the "10 commandments of fasting" in the Bible which tells me that God is looking for self discipline.  If we are going to fast, God is trusting us to fast something that is meaningful.  So if you don't like the way I'm fasting, you can fast your own way....and I'll fast my way. I'll publish updates every few days.

Day 1:

Started the day with a brief prayer time.  Breakfast/snack is seedless grapes, carrots, celery stalks, and flavored water. My weight this morning was 243.2 lbs.

Snacked on carrots, grapes, and celery.  Had salad, mashed potatoes, and corn for lunch. Read John 7 and 8.

Kim made vegetable soup for dinner and also made some unleavened bread. The bread was interesting and it made a nice substitution for crackers. I drank diet mtn dew. I didn't get home last night until almost 9:00 so I didn't read or spend significant time in prayer. Day 1 didn't feel like a stunning success but I've learned not to go on feelings.

Day 2:
I had an interesting and very improbable to come true dream last night. But when I woke up all I could think about was "with God nothing is impossible" Luke 1:37. Banana and nuts for breakfast. 

For lunch I had rice and mixed vegies (all cooked in vegetable oil only) and a small salad.  I read John 9 and 10 at lunch.  I will probably re-read that scripture. It shows a great view into Jesus' personality.

For dinner I had leftover vegetable soup.

Day 3:
Banana and Almonds for breakfast.  I had eye surgery so I spent all my time in prayer for Dr. Cunningham during the surgery. Lunch consisted of fried onions and potatoes and a salad.

I wasn't allowed to read so I missed out on Bible reading.  I spent all day on the couch watching TV because I wasn't allowed to do anything so I meditated on God quite a bit. Potatoes, onions, and salad for dinner because they were so good at lunch.

**Right now, Kim and I aren't "feeling" like we are sacrificing enough for the fast but I want to research and pray about that.  Proverbs says that our feelings will lead us astray.

Day 4:
Banana for breakfast.  Nuts and carrots for snack. Rice and mixed vegies for lunch. Salad with fruit and nuts for dinner.  Tried to cut back today because I was feeling guilty for being full.  Hunger is my biggest enemy during a 3-week fast but I think, at least at times, it is essential.  I don't think that opinion is necessary biblical.

Tonight, Kim and I spent 2 hours researching the Russian Orthodox church because Kassidi is in the process of converting. We weren't happy with that decision before tonight based on our research. After tonight, the Orthodox Church's worship reminds me a lot of the Pharisees.

Day 5:
Banana for breakfast.  Nuts, grapes, and carrots for snack. The hunger is there but it isn't overbearing.  

Lunch was my rice and veggies main-stay. For dinner, we had oat meal. Today, I found out that Kassidi puts her hope and faith in Mary (Theotokos) as well as Jesus. I believe that this belief is unscriptural and anti-Christ. I now know what the focus of my fast is.

Day 6:
Banana and peanut butter for breakfast. Popcorn for a snack at TWC lady bulldog game.

Day 6 brought a scare with Kelsi almost getting electrocuted. We spent the evening at Children's Hospital but as I expected she was just fine, just a burn on her finger. I give God the glory for her being OK because the conditions were right for something more devastating. 

We had a b-day party to go to Saturday night. We were late because of the scare but we made it. Against my better judgement, I had pasta with cheese and salad. We didn't have meat but we didn't want to make a big deal to anyone there that we were fasting.

Day 7:
Banana and peanut butter for breakfast. Day 7 was our 10-year anniversary as a church at RIO 180. We decided that because this was a celebration with our church family, we would not fast at lunch. However, I did put on the brakes compared to what I would have normally eaten and I was not a glutton. Got home and the spring on our garage door was broke ($250)

Dinner was very good.  Kim made rice, veggies, and fried tofu.  Yes, tofu. Kim is an amazing cook. I've eaten tofu before and it was just awful. I told her not to make me any, I would be happy with rice and veggies. To keep from hurting her feelings and so the kids would try it, I tried it. It was really good, I mean really good. Like I said, Kim is amazing and can even make tofu taste like southern cooking. I love her so much!!

Took Kassi back to school tonight. Oh my!! If you read this, please pray for my daughter. she needs guidance. Please pray for me, I need wisdom.

Day 8:
Banana for breakfast with some nuts for snack. Weight is 240 lbs. I am not fasting for weight loss or health reasons. BUT, I sure thank God for the residual effects. I feel great! I'm not tired or lethargic like I have been on a full fast. I would like a burger and I'm often hungry but other than that, I feel great.

Rice and veggies for lunch at Chef's Asian Cuisine.  For Dinner, Kim made Chili with some kind of beans that act like meat. It was really good

Day 9:
Mixed nuts and banana for breakfast. Nuts and carrots to munch on during the day to keep my hunger at a minimum. Rice and veggies for lunch.

While at lunch I got a text from my sister saying that my mother is going to have to have open heart surgery. More to fast and pray about. Salad for Dinner.

Day 10:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. I'm finding that I'm avoiding the craving for tasty foods by eating a lot of nuts, maybe too many. Rice and veggies for lunch.

Kim made a tasty potato soup for Dinner.  It was very good, it was hard not to over-eat.

Day 11:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. Rice and Veggies for lunch. I'm almost finished with the book of John and it is highly entertaining. The Holy Spirit and Brad Bryant, pastor of RIO 180, has really helped me to read the Bible with a fresh perspective. 

Really struggling with my daughter's orthodoxy. My prayers are really focused on her. Their belief that Mary is equal to Jesus and that all grace and mercy comes from her is damnable in my opinion.

Salad for dinner. I don't know if you've noticed but I'm a creature of habit and not creative. Kim and I tend to eat the same thing over and over. I believe that this is helping the effectiveness of our fast by further denying ourselves pleasure through food.

Day 12:
Banana and nuts for Breakfast. Soup and salad for lunch. Had lunch with my good friend John Meyer. Salad for Dinner.

Day 13:
Oatmeal for breakfast.  Popcorn for lunch at Kassi's BB game. Kim made potatoes, onions, and salad for dinner. So, so good!

Day 14:
Cereal for breakfast. Great church service today! Chili supper after church but we passed because of our fast. Salad for lunch at Ruby Tuesday's. It was tough not eating any of their delicious croutons.

Soup for dinner. Kassi and her boyfriend came over. We had a hard, heartfelt conversation with them regarding Orthodoxy. I was so sad for Kim because she poured her heart out and Kassi was emotionless.

Day 15:
It's a good think that I'm not fasting to lose weight. Weight today is 239.6. Banana and nuts for breakfast. Nuts and carrots for snack. Rice and veggies for lunch.

Rice and veggies for dinner.

Day 16:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. Potato soup and salad for lunch at Aubrey's. Although I do like rice and veggies and they are $3 cheaper than soup and salad, I'm finding that I might be growing a little tired of them. Finished the book of John and started Acts today. I can tell it will take me a while to read because it is so intriguing.

Vegetable chow-mien and rice for dinner. We ate out at Oriental Cuisine in Maryville. Although we don't eat out much, I do enjoy eating out with my family.

Day 17:
Banana and Nuts for breakfast. Banana, nuts, and carrots for snack. I added the banana to try to cut down on the nuts because even though I stay fairly hungry, I'm gaining weight.

SNOW DAY!! Left work early and it took an hour and 20 minutes to get home (33 miles). Salad for lunch. Played outside from 4:00 - 8:20 and had soooo much fun. Found out that Kelsi can ride a snow board really good.

Salad for dinner.

Day 18:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Nuts and carrots for snack. Mixed veggies for lunch. I'm thoroughly enjoying acts. If I haven't said so, lunch is my Bible time.

Egg noodles, salad, and green beans for dinner.

Day 19:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Banana, carrots, and nuts for snack. Salad and potato soup for lunch. Acts will be a slow read for me because I'm re-reading almost everything. I'm loving how much Acts is talking about the Holy Spirit and how much He is important to our lives.

Baked spaghetti for dinner. No yeast or meat, although very tasty, met the requirements of our fast.

Day 20:
At this point I'm looking forward to a burger or chicken fajitas. Life cereal for breakfast. Salad for lunch. Got some really good Bible time today and continued to read Acts. Today is Saturday and I've been reading Acts since Tuesday and in 3.5 hours I've only finished 10 chapters because I'm soaking it in.

Soup and salad for dinner.

Day 21:
Even though this isn't a diet, final weight is 237.6 so I lost 5.6 lbs. Banana and nuts for breakfast. Rice and mixed veggies for lunch and dinner. I doubt I'll have rice and veggies for a long time :)

Brad continued his series on MOVE. It has been very inspiring. He is challenging us to try to grow in the fruit of the spirit that we lack the most. Kim says mine is gentleness (same as Brad's) and I can't disagree with it.

Conclusion:
Kim and I both agree that although this fast has been successful, we think we should have deprived ourselves of more things. The last 21-day fast that I did I fasted meat and all processed food except milk and juice. It was so hard that I ate a TON of nuts and gained weight.

The thing that I see that has changed the most is in Kim. She has grown in wisdom and her passion for the Bible. I'm amazed by her growth in just 3 weeks. I am so proud of Kim and I'm so lucky to have her as my wife and help mate. I can't emphasize how she is grown in the Lord in just 3 weeks

Is this how Jesus sees us?

I'd like to share a text with you that Kim sent me yesterday.

"Epic morning with Kelsi this morning.  I love that little rascal.  She is amazing, she loves me so good and she is fun to love.  Unlike everyone else, she sees no flaws in me.  The older girls don't see me like she does.  One day, things will change.  But for now, she is my princess and I am her favorite queen."

 All of my life, I've loved the scripture that says "I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn't receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter in" (Luke 18:17 NLT).  I've always associated this with faith.  It takes childlike faith to be able to accept and believe the Gospel.  

Romans 14:17 tells us that the Kingdom of God is "righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit". I don't think that is the only definition for the Kingdom of God.  Graeme Goldworthy  summarizes the Kingdom of God as "God's people in God's place under God's rule."  I like that summary, especially when I think about it in terms of Christ.  Jesus is saying that if you don't receive God's people like a little child, you can't be a part of God's people.

Back to Kim and Kelsi (mother & 4-yr old daughter).  Kim's text about Kelsi is exactly how Jesus looks at (receives) Christians that have been covered by his blood.  Kim has never done any wrong in Kelsi's eyes.  Not only that, she is Kelsi's favorite person...favorite queen!  Every meal Kim makes Kelsi is the best she has ever had.  Every moment Kelsi spends with her mom is spent as though it would be her last.

I was blown away when God revealed this to me.  Jesus is all-knowing, all-powerful, omniscient, and omnipresent.  He created everything including you.  Yet when he sees us, it's not through judgmental eyes wondering why we act this way.  He sees us with eyes of acceptance like a child.  He wants every moment that you will give him.  And like with our children, every moment you give Him will never be wasted.  But we can't stop here.

This is also how God want's us to look at and accept others.  He wan'ts us to ignore flaws as though we can't see them.  He wants us to forgive trespasses like he forgives us.  He wants us to give like we own it all anyway.

God loves us so incredibly much.  He desires a personal relationship with all of us.  He want's to be with you at home and at work, not just at church.

God loves you and I do too!

John Knight

What Dad's and Husbands want to say

As a father and husband, I too often don't have the words to express my feelings.  It's too easy to get caught up in budgets, work, chores, activities, and everything else that I let steal my attention.  I have a very loving family and they are very accepting of my shortcomings because they love me.  They deserve better.  

Today, while listening to "106.7 The Light", I heard something that every husband and father wishes they could convey to their wife and daughters.  This is my message to my family.

Kim, Kassi, Kalli, and Kelsi this is for you.  Watch the video below to see what I want you to hear from me every day.  I love you!!

You are AWESOME!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWi5iXnguTU

God loves you and I do too!!
John Knight

The Treasure Chest

I heard something on the radio yesterday that brought back some memories.  I don't know if all doctors are like mine was when I was a kid, but when I was a kid there was a treasure chest at the end of the hall at Maryville Pediatric.  I went to Dr. Marmon when I was a kid.  He was great and I wasn't afraid of him at all but I still, I didn't want to go to the doctor.  There was one thing that always made life better at the doctor....The treasure chest.  

No matter how sick I was and no matter how many shots I had to have, I knew if I was tough I would be able to pick a toy out of the treasure chest.  How I loved going through the treasure chest.  As a young boy, it seemed like there was a thousand toys in that chest.  And I had my pick of each and every one.  As we drove for what seemed like hours to the doctor all I could think about was what toys may be in the chest.  When I sat in the waiting room and another kid would come out with his awesome treasure, I prayed that it wasn't the last one.  The treasure chest provided me with hope; hope that no matter what happened, everything would be OK once I got my toy.

I rarely went to the doctor when I was a kid; once or twice a year if that.  I had a great childhood filled with football, eating, and playing.  But sometimes something went wrong and I had to go to the doctor.

As christians, we have our own treasure chest in Jesus Christ, in Heaven, in the hope of seeing our Heavenly Father face to face some day.  In this journey of life that we are on, many days are great and we get to bask in the Grace of the Father without grief or worry.  But then there are days when worry and grief clouds our eyes to the point that we can't see our hope.  There are also times of chastisement and reprovement when God has to teach us something in order that we grow.  Do you know what I mean?   It's during those times that we need to remember that Jesus has provided us a treasure chest at the end or our visit.  If you are a Christian then you have the hope and the promise of eternal life.  As a matter of fact, Jesus Himself is preparing a place for us in His Father's house.  In fact, He said in John 14:1-3:

“Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me.

In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there you may be also."

Since dad died, saying that my heart has been troubled is an understatement.  I'm sad, I miss my dad.  But God is good, so good!  In my time of trouble He reminds me of the great promise that He made to me.  He lets me know that dad is digging in his proverbial treasure chest in heaven now.  Some day, I'll get to visit my treasure chest with Jesus.  But more that that!  He reminds me that there will be moments in life that will try us, but at the end of each trial, if we are brave and do what is right, there will be a treasure chest where He will reward us.  Our treasure on earth, if nothing else is hope.

God wants you to know that you have hope.  Even if you think there is none, there is hope.  So with that, I say hold on.  Hold on and never give up because Jesus loves you so very much.  He died for you.

God loves you and I do too!!
John

Pretty Woman

Who would have thought that I could have been inspired by Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman?  Pretty Woman is one of my wife's favorite movies and when she stumbled onto it this week she had to watch it.  What stood out to me was a moment in the film when Richard Gere was telling her how pretty and smart she was.  Then, he said something like he didn't understand why she couldn't see it.  She said "it's easier to believe the bad". 

That one statement spoke volumes to me.  As a father with three daughters, I'm always conscience of my daughter's self-esteem.  My wife is so very good at watching out for their self-esteem.  I try to say the right things but I just don't measure up to her.  We are fortunate to have three beautiful (inside and out) girls.  But I can't help to think about all of the pretty girls that I knew in high school that thought they were ugly.  Back then, I just wrote it off and assumed they just said that so they would hear someone tell them "you're not ugly, you're pretty".  Now that I'm older I can look back and see, based on the way some of them made decisions, they really did think they were ugly.

After all these years of Dateline reports, news reports, and other studies that I've been exposed to, mostly common sense stuff I guess, low self-esteem can cause a young woman to do things that aren't very Godly.  Low self-esteem is a tool that the devil uses against our teens to deceive them into making very bad decisions.  How many teenage girls have you known that have made some really bad decisions involving a boy that just didn't make sense?  I'll go out on a limb and say 99% of those bad decisions are because of low self-esteem.  Why?  Why does someone that is so pretty need to feel accepted by a boy so badly that they will do anything to win his approval?

The fact is that the devil will use one single thing to tear a teenager down.  For some reason, no matter how much good that has been said about you and to you, it only takes one bad thing to shake your self-esteem.  Like Julia Roberts said "it's easier to believe the bad".   That's why, as a parent, we MUST tell our children how good, pretty, or smart they are.  Starting from the day our kids can understand what we say we must give them positive reinforcement.  Because there is going to come a day when some immature boy or girl tells them "you’re not as pretty as you think you are" or they aren't going to win the starting position that they've worked so hard for.  You can be guaranteed that there will be times that will shake your child's self-esteem.  It happened to me and I bet it happened to you.  When that time comes, will there be enough good that it makes it at least harder to believe the bad?

Dad's, your daughters HAVE to know (not just think or wonder) that you think they are the prettiest girl alive.  They have to know that you believe in them.  Mom and Dad, they have to know that when the chips are down, they have parents they can go to who will help them and pray with them.  You must teach them what it means to be "fearfully and wonderfully made" Psalms 139:14.  I know it's hard but we have to teach them that God's acceptance is the only acceptance that they need.  Dad's, I know it's hard for us to pay compliments sometimes.  I don't know why, it just is.  But for your children's sake, we must do a better job of complimenting them.

And above all, pray, pray, pray.  Build a hedge of prayer around your children to help protect them from the bad that the devil is going to send their way.

I love you and God does too!

Is Divorce really what you want?

If you've been divorced this post may offend you. If it does, I'm so sorry because that certainly isn't my intent. But if you are married and especially married with children, this post is for you. We know what the Bible says about divorce and I think so many have heard it so many times that they may tend to ignore it; mostly because, I think, people know that God will forgive them when they do wrong. Given that, I'm not going to reference God or His will. I just want to focus on marriage.

Book after book has been written on this subject so I'm sure that I may not have any original thoughts. Tonight, Kalli and I went to Olive Garden and a lady with her two young girls was eating beside us and she didn't have a wedding ring on. Does that mean she is divorced? No. But going with the odds, she probably is. They were happy and having a fun time but I thought about how sad it was that these girls daddy wasn't with them.

When you first got married and were in love, did you say things to your newlywed spouse like "if we stay together" or "I hope we make it"? I doubt it. Those newlywed emotions run deep and hot, so hot that they tend to cool off after a while. That's no surprise and certainly not a profound statement. What's left when the newlywed feelings aren't so hot is marriage. Too many couples focus so hard on those newlywed feelings that they lose sight of why they have those feelings. They have them because they are with the one that they love and it's exciting to know that you will have them the rest of your life. That is the phrase that too many couples let go of so quickly; "the rest of your life". If your wedding vows were like mine and Kim's they included a "till death do us part" and "through better and/or worse". That is one heck of a commitment, a life-long commitment.

So when couples with children get divorced, what do they teach their children? First, they teach them that it is OK to quit on what is important. We teach our children to not quit. If they start something they can't quit. The more effort a kid puts into something, like sports, the more we encourage them when things get hard. We tell them something like "you've put so much into this, you've worked so hard, please don't quit now or you will regret it for the rest of your life". A friend of mine had a son who wanted to quit a sport during his senior season. He told him that the decision is his son's but he encouraged him not to quit and explained in great detail the impact it would have on the rest of his life. Even though it was hard and his situation didn't get easier, the boy stuck with it. He was glad he did and had no regrets for it.

A divorce also teaches kids that things worth having aren't worth working for. We teach our kids "if it's worth having then it's worth working for". How is the biggest commitment that you've ever made not worth working for? We teach our kids that if you want to be smart, you have to study. If you want to make better grades, you have to study harder. We all want a better marriage yet so many aren't willing to put any more effort into it.

In my opinion the problem boils down to two simple things; pride and selfishness.  I know this isn't new information but I can't stress how important these two things are and how they have no place in marriage. So if I'm telling you to work to keep your marriage, what work do you do? From my own experience, Kim and I spent a lot of time "working" at keeping those newlywed feelings. We spent years trying to get back that newlywed passion that we had. But if you want that fire back in your marriage or if you just want to keep your marriage the work shouldn't be spent on kindling passion and emotions. When you work at those things, you are trying to do work on your spouse. If it doesn't work then you may blame your spouse instead of yourself. The real work that needs to take place in marriage is the work that you do on you.

Most people, if not all, don't want to admit they are selfish. But you show me a failing marriage and I'll show you a marriage where one or both spouses are selfish. What is being selfish? Being selfish is simply putting your wants and needs ahead of your spouses. I'm not talking about serving yourself before your spouse. I'm not talking about spending your money on your spouse instead of yourself. What I'm talking about is when your feelings, your happiness is more important than your spouses. If you are struggling in your marriage, I encourage you to look inward at yourself first. Are you putting your happiness ahead of your spouse? Are you not giving your spouse what they want because "God didn't make you like that"? It's all about effort. Your spouse needs to see that you are willing to do ANYTHING for them, even if it's out of your comfort zone. And I'm really talking about meeting emotional needs not physical needs. Physical needs are important but emotional needs are so much more important. Your spouse needs, I mean really needs to know that you love them and they really are important enough to you that you committed the rest of your life to them.

What keeps people from being unselfish? Pride. Plain and simple, pride keeps you from doing the things your spouse needs and wants. When was the last time you said you were sorry when you really weren't? When was the last time that you held your tongue instead of saying what was on your mind? If you tend to say what is on your mind, even if it starts a fight then you have pride issues. If you never apologize just to keep the peace, especially before a fight starts, then you have pride issues. We teach our kids to take pride in what they do and we should. That kind of pride is good. When was the last time you thought about taking pride in your marriage? Or more, when was the last time that you took pride in your spouse? When was the last time that you felt proud to be married to them?

Marriage is hard, I know. Divorce rates are at 50% or higher inside and outside of the church. You can't worry about statistics and you can't use them as an excuse. A long time ago, I learned that if you wanted to succeed at anything you had to avoid "relative comparisons". Relative comparisons are when you compare what you're doing to someone else. It's when you say "I may not be great but I'm better than my neighbor". In marriage, we can't do that. The only thing that is important in marriage (outside of God) is your spouse. IT'S NOT YOU. You married the person that you're living with (or separated from) with the intention to be with them until you die. So you can't settle for a failing marriage and justify it because it hasn't failed yet like your neighbors did.

Love isn't that passion you felt as a newlywed. Love is the commitment you made to your spouse. Love is "till death do us part" and "for better or worse". If you want to teach your kids one of the most valuable lessons they could learn, show them how to love.

I know it is hard to do these things when your spouse isn't. But I can almost guarantee that if you put in the effort to work on yourself, your spouse will notice. If you haven't seen the movie "Firerproof" or haven't seen it in a while, watch it and watch it soon. Like I said, my thoughts aren't original they just can't be said enough.

I know there are times when divorce can't be avoided like spousal abuse. If your spouse is abusing you, I encourage you to get out now. However, there is a difference between being insensitive and being abusive.

I encourage you, I beg you, to strive for a prosperous marriage. I know you think your spouse is the problem and you may be right. However, if you will look to be a better spouse your efforts won't go unnoticed. It may take a while but it will be well worth it in the end. I can't think of a time when I said to myself "I wish I would have started that fight instead of holding my tongue".  If you need prayer about this Kim and I would be happy to pray for you.  You can reach me at johnkn.home@gmail.com.

If you live completely for Jesus today, you won't regret tomorrow what you did yesterday.
I love you and God does too!
John

Does Bad Company Really Corrupt Good Character?

Bad company corrupts good character.  That's what my mom told me.  That's what I've told my children.  That's what I've told converted Christians that wanted to witness in bars.  But does bad company really corrupt good character???

When I think about the life of Jesus I have to answer "not all of the time".  Jesus was our perfect example and, other than the disciples, He hung out with bad company.  Where did Jesus eat many of his meals?  He ate with tax collectors who were considered the worst sinners because they generally stole from the poor.  Tax collectors like Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10) and Matthew (Matt:9-11) hosted Jesus.  But according to Matt 9:10,11 there were plenty of sinners there.  Sinners like tax collectors, prostitutes, and Pharisees.  In Matt 9:12 Jesus went on to say that "It isn't the healthy that need a doctor but the sick", referring to "bad company" as the sick.

So bad company only corrupts good character some of the time.  Really?  I wonder which times that is.  This just doesn't make sense to me.  Jesus is our perfect example, our moral compass if you will (WWJD).  Jesus said that the "bad company" are the ones that need a physician so we need to know which bad company will corrupt good character and which ones won't.

The problem with my thinking is that I'm focusing on the bad company as being the problem.  Really, the problem with bad company corrupting good character isn't the bad company.  Bad company is bad company, we shouldn't be surprised when sinners sin.  Good character on the other hand is a different story.  Good character isn't supposed to go bad.  

When Jesus went to the men with leprosy (Luke 17:11-19) Jesus didn't catch it.  He healed them.  When Jesus hung out with sinners He didn't sin, His good character was incorruptible. In my opinion, the reason for this is because everywhere that He went He looked to serve in as humble and loving way possible.  I'm not saying that He served up booze, porn, or drugs.  What I am saying is that He served with love, providing what the bad company really needed, with love.  He didn't tell the prostitute and tax collectors "YOUR GOING TO HELLLLLL".  That's what He basically told the Pharisees.  

So with all of that, I have to make the declaration that bad company does NOT corrupt good character!  However, I will say that "bad company corrupts average character" or "bad company corrupts mediocre character".  

The type of ministry that Jesus did is not for the faint of heart.  We like to compare ourselves to the disciples and hope that we can find similarities.  The fact is that Jesus did not let His disciples minister to "bad company" unequipped.  Jesus told them to wait on the Holy Spirit (Luke 24:49, John 14: 16,17) after He was crucified.  The reason was He knew that they must have the power of the Holy Spirit to be able to endure and maintain there good character.

God has called us to witness in the highways and byways (Luke 14:23).  He wants us to server others.  You've heard the saying that "love is a verb", well Christianity should be an action word too.  Am I telling you to go to a bar alone to witness?  Absolutely not!  However, you should listen to the Holy Spirit and go where He draws you.  If you find yourself in a situation where you aren't serving the "bad company" that you are around, you should probably ask yourself why you are there.

Live for Jesus completely today so that tomorrow, you won't regret what you did yesterday.

God loves you and I do too!

The One Who Sins Will Die!! What??

As unexciting as it may be, I've been reading almost completely out of the Old Testament for the past few months.  You can't beat the Gospel in the New Testament but I love going back to the stories that I learned in Sunday School as a little boy.  Most of them came from the Old Testament.  Many scriptures are jumping out at me as I read but the ones that are really resonating with me seem to be those of redemption and forgiveness.  

Today, I was eating lunch and reading Ezekiel, when I got to chapter 18 the heading said "The One Who Sins Will Die".  

Now I don't know about you but that got my attention...real quick!  It's funny how the editors of the different Bible editions know exactly how to catch someone's attention.  It's funny because that really isn't the important message, it isn't what Ezekiel 18 is about at all.  Yes, Ezekiel 18 spends a good deal of time focusing on a sinner.  But it also focuses on the righteous and, more importantly to me, the the repentant sinner.

For some reason lately, I've really had repentance and forgiveness on my mind when I've been reading the Bible.  Partly, I'm sure, because of Prison Ministry.  So anytime I get to read a verse that backs up what I believe, I think it's awesome.  Maybe I'm the only person that the devil still tells during those tired times that "you aren't saved".  Or "none of this would have happened if you were really saved".  Of course I know better but that still doesn't mean that the devil doesn't come at me with that crap.  Ez. 18:21 (NIV) says;

 "But if a wicked person turns away from all the sins they have committed and keeps all my decrees and does what is just and right, that person will surely live; they will not die".


That verse really excites me.  When I read it I just said to myself "that's me".  I was a wicked person but I turned away from all the sins that I committed and I keep the decrees of the lord.  I do what is right and just.  I have repented.  That's me!

Is it you?  Are you the new man in Ez. 18:21 or are you the man depicted in Ez. 18:24in which God says;

"But if a righteous person turns from their righteousness and commits sin and does the same detestable things the wicked person does, will they live?  None of the righteous things that person has done will be remembered.  Because of the unfaithfulness they are guilty of and because of the sins they have committed, they will die".

The great thing about God is that he always makes provisions.  If you happen to be the person described in Ez. 18:24 (righteous turned wicked), God sent His son Jesus to die for your sins.  Simply turn from sin and do good and seek forgiveness from Christ and you will be the person described in Ez. 18:21.  As for me, I've been wishy-washy like the Ez. 18:24 man in the past but my commitment to God is to never be like that again.  Our walk with Christ and our eternal fate is much to important to ever turn back on God.

If you live for Christ today then tomorrow, you won't regret what you did yesterday.
God loves you and I do too!

She thinks we're just fishin

Kassi

Kelsi

Kalli

Over the years, I have had four really good fishing buddies. Although dad and I fished some when I was a kid, I was more concerned with football than fishing. So really, Kim was the first person to really turn me on to fishing. Since that day on Fontana when I got hooked (pun intended), I have loved to fish. God has blessed me with a big pond in my front yard so I get to go anytime I want to. The really fun thing though is when one of my girls goes with me.

Kim was my original fishing buddy (and is still the prettiest) but once Kassi could hold a fishing pole, she would come out and fish with daddy. She once caught a Blue Gill with only a hook, no bait!  Kassi stuck with it for a little while but once basketball came along, she kinda lost interest in fishing. Then came Kalli. I gotta give credit where credit is due, Kalli has been my good-luck-charm fishing buddy. For some reason, I always caught more fish with her than with anybody. Kalli would also handle the fish more than most girls would. And now, there is Kelsi. She is going to be a really good fishing buddy. She started last year but she really couldn't manage her sponge-bob fishing pole then. This year, she is holding her own.  She is the most patient out of all of my fishing buddies.

Last night, she caught her first fish and I wish I could have caught her reaction on video. She was so excited, once she could see the fish at the bank she almost through her pole down.  She actually froze she was laughing so hard.

Over the years, I've had a lot of nice evenings with my girls just fishin. I'd love to tell you some emotional, tear jerking story like Trace Atkins' song 'she thinks we're just fishin' but I don't know if I have any. What I do know is that when we go fishing, shoot basketball, throw softball, play with Lego's, go swimming, or whatever we do together, I'm fulfilling God's word by bringing my kids up the way that they should go. I'm letting them know that they are important. They know that dad is busy with work and chores but I always should let them know that I'm not too busy for them.

I'd love to tell you that my years have including hundreds or thousands of evenings spending quality time with my daughters but unfortunately, that would be a lie. Fact is, I'm an imperfect father. I tend to get caught up in the "rules" and "discipline" side of fatherhood and I let mom focus on the "loving" and "nurturing" side. But as a Christian father, it is so important for us to truly live one day at a time. Yes, we have to plan for the future but some day, she's not going to be my little girl, she's going to be my young lady, then she's going to be my grown woman.  

When my little girls are grown what have I taught them? Right now, who cares! Life's lessons will happen on their own, we don't have to make them happen. I just need to make sure that when they do happen, I'm there to help and to love them. I have to make sure that my girls will trust me and know that I care.

I hope you take time to cherish those "little" moments with your kids. They are the moments that they don't recognize today as being significant but someday they wouldn't take a million dollars for them. I know I'll always cherish my time at the pond with each of my girls and if I play my cards right, some day, they will too.

Live for Jesus completely today so that tomorrow you won't regret what you did yesterday.

I love you and God does too!

Happy Birthday Little Brother!!

Regret!!!  Life is full of it.  In it's simplest form, regret is just the mindset of wishing you would have done something different, usually because of the outcome of a decision.  I try to teach my children to not have regret in life because it is very hard to fix.

My life is full of regret; I wish I would have tried harder in school, I wish I would have been closer to my grand parents whom are all dead now, I wish I would have insisted on playing Line-Backer full time instead of Defensive End, I wish I would have had short hair, I wish I would have tried contacts sooner, I wish I would have taken my relationship with God seriously, I wish I would have maintained friendships...... I think you get the picture.

Now what does all of this have to do with wishing my brother (Jody Knight) a Happy Birthday?  Well its simple, I have a lot of regret when it comes to the way I handled our relationship as children.  Anyone who knows us knows that we have completely different personalities and we always have since birth.  Basically, his personality was good and mine was bad.  I loved my brother but I was jealous of him because he was "cuter" or "nicer" than I was.  When you couple that jealousy with the fact that I was mean , I was more of a bully than a brother much of the time.  

Now don't get me wrong, we had a lot of fun.  We played football, baseball, and Nerf-hoop in our bedroom all the time and we played in the woods, swung on muscadine vines, played in the creek in the woods, went swimming, and rode our bikes a lot.  But for anyone who has ever been in a bad relationship, the memories that tend to stand out aren't the good ones, its the bad.  It would be too easy for me to tell too much about the negative so I think that I will just leave it at "I was mean to my brother, too mean".

After all these years I love my brother very much and I always have.  I have always been very proud of him.  I have the utmost respect for my brother.  He was a great athlete in school, he was was always smarter than me, and he beat me at every video game we ever played.  Now, he is a strong, reliable, Christian man.  He is a loving husband and loving father.  Like me, he isn't perfect but I think he is a lot closer than I am.  I've done what I know to do to let him know that I love him and I know that he knows that I love him.  The problem is that word "regret".  I just can't help but wonder how things would be today (for both of us and our families) if I would have let the love of Christ overshadow my relationship with my brother.

And you?  Do you have any regret like me?  You can't go back and undo what has been done but you can ask for forgiveness and then move on. Maybe you were on the other end of the stick and you are harboring hard feelings because of the way you were treated.  You must forgive.  

Regret isn't healthy but it is a fact.  All we can do is live our lives from this point on with no regret.  If you live today completely for Jesus, then tomorrow, you won't regret what you did yesterday.

I love you and God does too!

It's never too late

A few weeks ago, pastor Brad used Jeremiah 18:1-4 in a message series that he preached.  Since then, that scripture has been echoing in my mind.  The NLT version reads like this:

The Lord gave another message to Jeremiah. He said, 2 “Go down to the potter’s shop, and I will speak to you there.” 3 So I did as he told me and found the potter working at his wheel.4 But the jar he was making did not turn out as he had hoped, so he crushed it into a lump of clay again and started over.

Verse 4 is what resonates with me.  God specifically was telling Jeremiah that Israel had not turned out as he intended, so like a potter does clay, he was going to crush Israel and start over.  This verse makes me think about my personal life and testimony.  I can see myself on the Potter's wheel and things are spinning and He is molding me as planned.  But then a flaw comes out of the clay that messes up the pot.  As long as I am willing to accept being crushed, the Potter takes me back to a form he can work with and starts again.

Sometimes, the Potter has to completely crush me because the flaw is so big that I just have to go back to the beginning.  Sometimes, he just has to use a tool to dig out an imperfection.  This may leave a scar but that will become part of my testimony.

Obviously, I use this verse when I do prison ministry because everyone knows that a felon needs to start over.  But how about us?  How willing are we to let God crush us into a lump of clay so he can start over with us?  Too often, I'm afraid, we tell God "not yet, let me finish here and then you can have me".  Or just as bad, we see other flawed jars and we tell God that our flaw isn't so bad, especially compared to our neighbor.

Probably the saddest situation is the person that thinks that their flaws are too bad for God to want to fix.  Or maybe they think they aren't important enough for God to fix.  I know this sounds crazy but after talking to the people that I have over the years, you should never be surprised how someone may think or feel.  I have met so many people that just didn't feel worthy to be saved or "fixed".  There are so many hurting people that don't realize that what they have done just doesn't matter to God.  All He cares about is whether you are a willing vessel that is willing to let Him mold you.  Are you?

God loves people, period!  He may hate sin but he loves people.  He loves drunks, drug addicts, child molesters, adulterers, homosexuals, murderers, and liars...to name a few.  He will forgive sins and THEN put you on the Potter's wheel for him to mold.  God is ready to forgive sins and accept you as you are, we just have to be willing vessels.

God loves you and I do too!

Childlike Faith

Well its been a while since I've posted anything.  OK, its been forever ago.  After my last post about my dad my emotions were just way too deep.  Although I enjoy sharing on this blog, there are just some things that I prefer to keep private and after much discussion with Kim I decided that I'd hold off for a while.

Back to Childlike faith...

I was talking to Kim last night about dad's faith.  Kim made the comment "your dad has such great faith" and he does.  I truly wished that I had his faith but I have yet to concur my cynicism, skepticism, and pessimism to have that great of faith.  But after thinking about it and trying to figure out why I don't have the faith that he does it really just boils down to one thing....TRUST!

Dad, like a child, trusts in God.  The Bible tells him "ask and ye shall receive" (Matt 7:7, Matt 21:22), "if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven." (Matt 18:18-20), and "Therefore I say to you whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." (Mark 11:24).  

When we put our hands on a loved one and pray, do we think; "I hope God heals them" or "I can't wait to see God heal them"?  I know which one that I unfortunately lean toward.  Jesus said “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven." (Matt 18:3).  This is a very broad statement but it is as simple as Christ was saying it...to adults; "your children trust in you, you must trust in Me" is what Jesus was saying.

My dad has this kind of trust and faith.  And his reward?  He has been cancer free since the tumor was removed in December.  I specifically spoke with two neurosurgeons that both believed that even after the tumor was removed, he would only have 12 months to live and that he would probably start deteriorating after 6 months.  Dad has had one clean MRI and he finds out the results of the second tomorrow.  His statement to Kim was "I don't know why they keep wasting their time and mine because they aren't going to find anything".  That's faith.

Find ways to practice your faith, that's right, practice.  The bible is quite plain that we are all given the same "measure of faith" (Rom 12:3).  It's up to us to learn how to use it through practice and prayer.

God loves you and I do too!

I want to be like him

By reading this, I'm sure you know that my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor Tuesday night. Since then, I've spent a lot of time with him and the rest of my family. My brother, Jody, has hardly left his side. While I have been with him, I've paid close attention to him. I've come to many conclusions over the past few days but one is resonating with me right now. No matter how old I get, I want to be like my dad when I grow up.

When I was a boy, I thought my dad drove a train because he worked at ALCOA where all the train tracks were. I thought that was awesome. So when I grew up, I wanted to be like my dad and drive a train.

When I was 8 or 9 years old, we lost power in a storm. We had a well for water so if there was no electricity there was no water. If there was no water, we couldn't flush commodes. Once the sun went down, this was a precarious situation for me because I did not want to go up in the woods to use the bathroom because it was dark and I was afraid. Not dad. When he needed to go, he took off and didn't even take a flash light. He wasn't scared one bit. When I grew up, I wanted to be just like my dad because he wasn't afraid of anything.

As I became a teen, I would meet people that my dad worked with. Sometimes they would say, "there isn't a more honest man than John Knight. I hope you're as honest as he is". Or they would tell me some story about how dad worked out a difficult situation with the Union at ALCOA and would say "you're lucky if you're as smart as your dad". But my favorite and the one used most often was when they would always say "Oh! your John's boy. If you grow up to be half the man your dad is you will be a good man". So when I grew up, I wanted to be like my dad because he was a good man.

Today I watched a man, stricken with a brain tumor pray for the preacher that was praying for him. Today, I watched my dad give thanks to God because no matter what, he knows that God will take care of him. I watched as he witnessed to every nurse and doctor that came in his room. When I grow up, I want to be like my dad, I want to be someone that is NEVER ashamed or scared to talk about Jesus to anyone.

As I type this blog, my dad and I are listening to a CD of my mom singing and Betty Bowman playing the piano. Right as I thought he was asleep, he raised up and as he cried happy tears he said:

"Son, I love that woman! Listen to that voice, have you ever heard anything more beautiful in your life? We've been together for nearly 50 years and we've had our struggles; some my fault and some her fault, but through it all, we are more in love today than we have ever been. I love your mother so much, I could never make it without her. Just listen to her. There is nothing more beautiful to my ears as your mother's voice, listen".

With that, he laid back and just listened. I want to be able to look back at nearly 50 years of marriage and say "through it all, we are more in love today than ever". When I grow up, I want to be just like my dad.

I love you and God does too!!

Scars

I was looking in the mirror today as I guess most normal people do when they wash their hands when I noticed two scars above my left eye.  Its not that I was surprised or anything, I knew they were there, they've been there for 39 years.  I just thought it was funny how days, weeks, and even months go by without me noticing the scars yet they are always there.

I have all kinds of scars; scars caused by falls, scars caused by my carelessness, scars caused by others.  Some of my scars are my fault, some were caused by others, and some couldn't be avoided at all.  I have scars that I'm proud of (I'm still a little boy inside) and I have some that I'm quite ashamed of.  Many of my scars I remember how I got while many more I just don't remember.  I remember when I was a kid, I once counted 22 scars on my left knee...and I was proud.

As I was looking in the mirror I realized that these two scars on my head symbolized much more than just a couple of falls when I was a kid.  Now I know this probably isn't original thinking and I'm sure someone smarter than me has put this in a much better way but this is me....and these are my scars.  As I looked in the mirror God showed me how there are other scars that we have other than physical.  These emotional scars are much like my scars; some we cause, some others caused, and some were just unavoidable.   The fact is that we all have scars somewhere.

Our emotional scars are much like our physical scars in many ways;
1) We start to forget what caused the scar when the hurt goes away.  With many scars, there is a pain that remains even when it looks like healing is done.  Those are deep scars caused by a deep cut.  All too often, we dwell on what caused the hurt rather than the fact that healing has began.  All we can feel is the hurt and all we can see is the scar so it is hard to see the fact that God is working and is providing a healing.  Sometimes that healing isn't as fast as we would like but inevitably, it comes.

2) Generally speaking, the smaller the scar the smaller the injury and conversely,  the bigger the scar, the worse the injury.  This is obvious but needs to be pointed out.  If you only have a small scar, the injury probably wasn't that bad.  In those cases, we shouldn't make a mountain out of a mole hill.  Those small injuries heal fast so we shouldn't persecute anyone that caused it as though they had severely injured you.

3) When scars are out of site, we forget about them.  Is this so wrong?  Is it wrong to forget about the past?  To forget about the pain that someone else caused you?  I don't think so.  What is in the past is in the past and if you have forgiven someone for causing your scar then you shouldn't dwell on it.  Let it go.

4) If we can see the scar then we all too often dwell on the past.  The fact is that some of our emotional scars are on our face (not literally of course).  Unfortunately, some of our scars, usually the worst ones, are right there in the open so we are always reminded of them.  We think about them and sometimes we even think that we can still feel pain in them.  Certainly when we see them, we remember the pain and we remember how we got it.  Sometimes, seeing these scars can fill our hearts with regret; regret about how we got the scar, regret about how we healed, or regret about how we didn't heal.  

And usually, the older we were when we got injured, the longer it takes for healing to take place.  It's funny how the younger I was when I got one of my scars, the less likely I am to even remember how I got it.  I have some really bad scars that I got when I was young and I can hardly remember getting it.  Then there are others that I got when I was older.  They aren't as big but for some reason, I remember the hurt much more vividly than the bigger scar I got when I was a kid.

Scars, we've all got them.  In some way, some form, or some fashion they are there.  We live with them.  Sometimes we can cover them up and sometimes we can't.  Some aren't noticeable and some make a passerby flinch in pain when they see it.  But you know what?  These are my scars.  They are a part of me.  They don't define me and I rarely think of them but they are mine.  I own them, whether I caused them or not I own them.  If I don't own my scars then I believe I would think about them more.  If I thought about the injury, I would think about the cause and that opens the door for shame and regret.

The fact is that the devil wants us to remember our shame and regret but as the song says "...I remember oh God you're not done with me yet".  And remember, if you have a scar that means it's no longer a scab, God is finishing His work on that injury.  Don't let your scars define you and don't let them cause more pain.  You have them now and there isn't anything you can do about it.  Let them heal and give God the glory.

I love you and God does too!