My cool daughter Kalli

Four years ago I wrote a blog about my cool daughter Kassi. It's time that I brag on my cool daughter Kalli. In my blog about Kassi, I shared something random that she did.

Kalli lives a life of randomness picking one thing would be difficult. We never know what she is going to say or do next. She constantly makes me smile. Last night, her youth group came over for an end-of-the-year pool party. I was setting next to an adult while Kalli was with her friends. Out of the blue, she came over and started randomly dancing to an 80's tune. Now you have to understand mine and Kalli's random dancing; we act out the song with a dance...a very goofy one usually. She didn't care who was watching, she only wanted to make me laugh.

Kalli is a very pretty girl AND she likes looking pretty. But I love how she still will act like a little girl and get excited over the smallest things. This morning, Kim got up early and decided to wake the girls and take them to the new Waffle House. Kalli (and Kelsi) were so excited, Kim said "you would have thought I took them to Regas". Kelsi is 6 so her being excited about anything is understandable. Kalli is 15 now, she just got excited because it was the fun thing to do. On top of that, she went as-is. She didn't care who saw her. I think it was because she was with her mom who is just as big of a kid.

It amazes me and thrills me how her and her mother have grown so close this summer. Anyone who is close to the Knights know that we have had some family adversity for the past 2 years and it has really been stepped up the past 6 months. Kalli has really stepped in to be a comfort for Kim. Somehow she always knows how to make Kim feel good...to make her feel loved, an extra special mother-daughter love.

Kalli went on a mission trip with her Rio 180 youth group this summer to Panama. Because of the flu outbreak in Panama nothing went as planned. When you are on a mission trip in a foreign country and you don't have an agenda, it can be rough. Kalli didn't complain. There was adversity and Kalli handled it very maturely. All the while, she was doing ministry.

Kim, Kalli, and Kelsi went to Girls camp this weekend with our church and with RIO Central. There were at least 40 kids there and most of the pictures that I saw with Kalli had her sister Kelsi in them too. She is such a good big sister. She has more motherly instincts than many mothers that I have met.

Oh yeah...and she made the Sevier County High School Dance Team this summer. I am so very proud of her and I am very proud to call her my daughter. Kalli and I are alike in many ways and I see a few contentious confrontations in our future but that's OK. Kalli and I are close and we can handle conflict. One of us will win and the other will say she (foreshadowing) is sorry. We'll hug it out and everything will be OK. Then she'll go tell her mom on me :) so she gets more hugs.

I love 'er (inside joke) and I just can't help it.

Thank you God for giving Kalli to Kim and Me.

My 21-Day Fast

I've fasted before but I have never documented my methods, reasons, or results. This is my attempt to document my fast in hopes that it may help someone down the road.

First the reason: why fast?  The Bible is full of examples of fasting, commands to fast, and reason's to fast. If I tried to document the reasons why a Christian should fast we would be here for a long time. Daniel fasted and because of his fast, his prayers were answered. Jesus said certain spirits could only be cast out through prayer and fasting. My interpretation of that is greater power in Jesus.

Fasting works.  Three years ago, I went on a 21-day fast because my dad was diagnosed with incurable cancer. After my fast, I prayed for dad and from that point on, he proclaimed his healing.  His doctors weren't as convinced.  Finally, in July of 2013, Dad's doctor told him he was cancer free.

I am fasting now for a number of reasons. First is because I need to be closer to God, I believe if I fast, I will draw closer to him. Second is for a number of personal needs in my family. And my last reason to fast is because my wife (Kim) is going to.  I want to support her. The fact is it is easier to fast with a partner.

My methods: This fast will last 21 days starting January 4, 2016. I will be fasting meat, bread, and sweets. I will eat bread without yeast or lard (unleavened bread). I do plan to drink flavored water and diet drinks.

For anyone that is tempted to reply with how I am fasting wrong, please just take it up with God and keep it to yourself. I haven't found the "10 commandments of fasting" in the Bible which tells me that God is looking for self discipline.  If we are going to fast, God is trusting us to fast something that is meaningful.  So if you don't like the way I'm fasting, you can fast your own way....and I'll fast my way. I'll publish updates every few days.

Day 1:

Started the day with a brief prayer time.  Breakfast/snack is seedless grapes, carrots, celery stalks, and flavored water. My weight this morning was 243.2 lbs.

Snacked on carrots, grapes, and celery.  Had salad, mashed potatoes, and corn for lunch. Read John 7 and 8.

Kim made vegetable soup for dinner and also made some unleavened bread. The bread was interesting and it made a nice substitution for crackers. I drank diet mtn dew. I didn't get home last night until almost 9:00 so I didn't read or spend significant time in prayer. Day 1 didn't feel like a stunning success but I've learned not to go on feelings.

Day 2:
I had an interesting and very improbable to come true dream last night. But when I woke up all I could think about was "with God nothing is impossible" Luke 1:37. Banana and nuts for breakfast. 

For lunch I had rice and mixed vegies (all cooked in vegetable oil only) and a small salad.  I read John 9 and 10 at lunch.  I will probably re-read that scripture. It shows a great view into Jesus' personality.

For dinner I had leftover vegetable soup.

Day 3:
Banana and Almonds for breakfast.  I had eye surgery so I spent all my time in prayer for Dr. Cunningham during the surgery. Lunch consisted of fried onions and potatoes and a salad.

I wasn't allowed to read so I missed out on Bible reading.  I spent all day on the couch watching TV because I wasn't allowed to do anything so I meditated on God quite a bit. Potatoes, onions, and salad for dinner because they were so good at lunch.

**Right now, Kim and I aren't "feeling" like we are sacrificing enough for the fast but I want to research and pray about that.  Proverbs says that our feelings will lead us astray.

Day 4:
Banana for breakfast.  Nuts and carrots for snack. Rice and mixed vegies for lunch. Salad with fruit and nuts for dinner.  Tried to cut back today because I was feeling guilty for being full.  Hunger is my biggest enemy during a 3-week fast but I think, at least at times, it is essential.  I don't think that opinion is necessary biblical.

Tonight, Kim and I spent 2 hours researching the Russian Orthodox church because Kassidi is in the process of converting. We weren't happy with that decision before tonight based on our research. After tonight, the Orthodox Church's worship reminds me a lot of the Pharisees.

Day 5:
Banana for breakfast.  Nuts, grapes, and carrots for snack. The hunger is there but it isn't overbearing.  

Lunch was my rice and veggies main-stay. For dinner, we had oat meal. Today, I found out that Kassidi puts her hope and faith in Mary (Theotokos) as well as Jesus. I believe that this belief is unscriptural and anti-Christ. I now know what the focus of my fast is.

Day 6:
Banana and peanut butter for breakfast. Popcorn for a snack at TWC lady bulldog game.

Day 6 brought a scare with Kelsi almost getting electrocuted. We spent the evening at Children's Hospital but as I expected she was just fine, just a burn on her finger. I give God the glory for her being OK because the conditions were right for something more devastating. 

We had a b-day party to go to Saturday night. We were late because of the scare but we made it. Against my better judgement, I had pasta with cheese and salad. We didn't have meat but we didn't want to make a big deal to anyone there that we were fasting.

Day 7:
Banana and peanut butter for breakfast. Day 7 was our 10-year anniversary as a church at RIO 180. We decided that because this was a celebration with our church family, we would not fast at lunch. However, I did put on the brakes compared to what I would have normally eaten and I was not a glutton. Got home and the spring on our garage door was broke ($250)

Dinner was very good.  Kim made rice, veggies, and fried tofu.  Yes, tofu. Kim is an amazing cook. I've eaten tofu before and it was just awful. I told her not to make me any, I would be happy with rice and veggies. To keep from hurting her feelings and so the kids would try it, I tried it. It was really good, I mean really good. Like I said, Kim is amazing and can even make tofu taste like southern cooking. I love her so much!!

Took Kassi back to school tonight. Oh my!! If you read this, please pray for my daughter. she needs guidance. Please pray for me, I need wisdom.

Day 8:
Banana for breakfast with some nuts for snack. Weight is 240 lbs. I am not fasting for weight loss or health reasons. BUT, I sure thank God for the residual effects. I feel great! I'm not tired or lethargic like I have been on a full fast. I would like a burger and I'm often hungry but other than that, I feel great.

Rice and veggies for lunch at Chef's Asian Cuisine.  For Dinner, Kim made Chili with some kind of beans that act like meat. It was really good

Day 9:
Mixed nuts and banana for breakfast. Nuts and carrots to munch on during the day to keep my hunger at a minimum. Rice and veggies for lunch.

While at lunch I got a text from my sister saying that my mother is going to have to have open heart surgery. More to fast and pray about. Salad for Dinner.

Day 10:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. I'm finding that I'm avoiding the craving for tasty foods by eating a lot of nuts, maybe too many. Rice and veggies for lunch.

Kim made a tasty potato soup for Dinner.  It was very good, it was hard not to over-eat.

Day 11:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. Rice and Veggies for lunch. I'm almost finished with the book of John and it is highly entertaining. The Holy Spirit and Brad Bryant, pastor of RIO 180, has really helped me to read the Bible with a fresh perspective. 

Really struggling with my daughter's orthodoxy. My prayers are really focused on her. Their belief that Mary is equal to Jesus and that all grace and mercy comes from her is damnable in my opinion.

Salad for dinner. I don't know if you've noticed but I'm a creature of habit and not creative. Kim and I tend to eat the same thing over and over. I believe that this is helping the effectiveness of our fast by further denying ourselves pleasure through food.

Day 12:
Banana and nuts for Breakfast. Soup and salad for lunch. Had lunch with my good friend John Meyer. Salad for Dinner.

Day 13:
Oatmeal for breakfast.  Popcorn for lunch at Kassi's BB game. Kim made potatoes, onions, and salad for dinner. So, so good!

Day 14:
Cereal for breakfast. Great church service today! Chili supper after church but we passed because of our fast. Salad for lunch at Ruby Tuesday's. It was tough not eating any of their delicious croutons.

Soup for dinner. Kassi and her boyfriend came over. We had a hard, heartfelt conversation with them regarding Orthodoxy. I was so sad for Kim because she poured her heart out and Kassi was emotionless.

Day 15:
It's a good think that I'm not fasting to lose weight. Weight today is 239.6. Banana and nuts for breakfast. Nuts and carrots for snack. Rice and veggies for lunch.

Rice and veggies for dinner.

Day 16:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Carrots and nuts for snack. Potato soup and salad for lunch at Aubrey's. Although I do like rice and veggies and they are $3 cheaper than soup and salad, I'm finding that I might be growing a little tired of them. Finished the book of John and started Acts today. I can tell it will take me a while to read because it is so intriguing.

Vegetable chow-mien and rice for dinner. We ate out at Oriental Cuisine in Maryville. Although we don't eat out much, I do enjoy eating out with my family.

Day 17:
Banana and Nuts for breakfast. Banana, nuts, and carrots for snack. I added the banana to try to cut down on the nuts because even though I stay fairly hungry, I'm gaining weight.

SNOW DAY!! Left work early and it took an hour and 20 minutes to get home (33 miles). Salad for lunch. Played outside from 4:00 - 8:20 and had soooo much fun. Found out that Kelsi can ride a snow board really good.

Salad for dinner.

Day 18:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Nuts and carrots for snack. Mixed veggies for lunch. I'm thoroughly enjoying acts. If I haven't said so, lunch is my Bible time.

Egg noodles, salad, and green beans for dinner.

Day 19:
Banana and nuts for breakfast. Banana, carrots, and nuts for snack. Salad and potato soup for lunch. Acts will be a slow read for me because I'm re-reading almost everything. I'm loving how much Acts is talking about the Holy Spirit and how much He is important to our lives.

Baked spaghetti for dinner. No yeast or meat, although very tasty, met the requirements of our fast.

Day 20:
At this point I'm looking forward to a burger or chicken fajitas. Life cereal for breakfast. Salad for lunch. Got some really good Bible time today and continued to read Acts. Today is Saturday and I've been reading Acts since Tuesday and in 3.5 hours I've only finished 10 chapters because I'm soaking it in.

Soup and salad for dinner.

Day 21:
Even though this isn't a diet, final weight is 237.6 so I lost 5.6 lbs. Banana and nuts for breakfast. Rice and mixed veggies for lunch and dinner. I doubt I'll have rice and veggies for a long time :)

Brad continued his series on MOVE. It has been very inspiring. He is challenging us to try to grow in the fruit of the spirit that we lack the most. Kim says mine is gentleness (same as Brad's) and I can't disagree with it.

Conclusion:
Kim and I both agree that although this fast has been successful, we think we should have deprived ourselves of more things. The last 21-day fast that I did I fasted meat and all processed food except milk and juice. It was so hard that I ate a TON of nuts and gained weight.

The thing that I see that has changed the most is in Kim. She has grown in wisdom and her passion for the Bible. I'm amazed by her growth in just 3 weeks. I am so proud of Kim and I'm so lucky to have her as my wife and help mate. I can't emphasize how she is grown in the Lord in just 3 weeks

The Abortion Cross

I know that most of us have seen the Abortion Crosses in the yards of our churches in Blount County.  My church even puts them out for several weeks out of the year.  I wonder though, what message does this send?  "We are against abortions", "We are against murder".  It does say those things I guess but that can't be why the Abortion Cross is displayed.  If it is, we should put out Adultery Crosses and Lying Crosses because we are against adultery and lying.  Is the intent of the Abortion Cross to stop little girls from getting an abortion because they saw the love of Jesus coming out of the cross?  If that is the intention, we missed it badly.  Maybe the intended message is political.  Maybe the Abortion Cross is put up to try to sway voters.

Whatever the reason for the Abortion Cross, my opinion is that it does more harm than good.  The Abortion Cross doesn't scream love or even hope.  These crosses aren't symbols of resurrection of our Lord, in this case, they are symbols of graves.   They are reminders of "Look what you did".

I wonder if one hurting, crying, alone little girl ever attended a church because of the church's Abortion Cross display.  When talking to her boyfriend about what to do, did he say "why don't you go talk to someone at the church with the Abortion Crosses, I bet they will understand".  

What about the little girl or woman that had an abortion.  For the rest of her life, she is haunted by the decision she made.  It will never, ever go away.  Even when they have been forgiven, there will always be that hurt.  And when they are hurting and looking for help, will they go to the Abortion Cross church?  Absolutely not.  

I drove by my church a couple of weeks ago on a non-church day and saw the Abortion Crosses.  I then drove through the park and saw some teenagers.  I was taken to tears when I began to dwell on the remote possibility of one of those girls having had an abortion and now they have been reminded once again of what they did.  Many girls/women that have abortions never tell anyone.  Churches should be a sanctuary for hurting people and the the church shouldn't do anything to keep them away.

The bible says "There is therefore no more condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit", Romans 8:1.  If the church believes that, then why to we provide another tool for the devil to use all in the name of "standing up for what is right".  

In marriage, we pick our battles wisely.  I think it's time for churches to do the same.

I know most of you won't agree with me and that's OK.  This is my opinion, it doesn't have to be yours.  I just ask that if you are responsible for putting out Abortion Crosses, ask yourself "Does this really show the love of Jesus?".

I love you and God does too,
John Knight

Is this how Jesus sees us?

I'd like to share a text with you that Kim sent me yesterday.

"Epic morning with Kelsi this morning.  I love that little rascal.  She is amazing, she loves me so good and she is fun to love.  Unlike everyone else, she sees no flaws in me.  The older girls don't see me like she does.  One day, things will change.  But for now, she is my princess and I am her favorite queen."

 All of my life, I've loved the scripture that says "I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn't receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter in" (Luke 18:17 NLT).  I've always associated this with faith.  It takes childlike faith to be able to accept and believe the Gospel.  

Romans 14:17 tells us that the Kingdom of God is "righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit". I don't think that is the only definition for the Kingdom of God.  Graeme Goldworthy  summarizes the Kingdom of God as "God's people in God's place under God's rule."  I like that summary, especially when I think about it in terms of Christ.  Jesus is saying that if you don't receive God's people like a little child, you can't be a part of God's people.

Back to Kim and Kelsi (mother & 4-yr old daughter).  Kim's text about Kelsi is exactly how Jesus looks at (receives) Christians that have been covered by his blood.  Kim has never done any wrong in Kelsi's eyes.  Not only that, she is Kelsi's favorite person...favorite queen!  Every meal Kim makes Kelsi is the best she has ever had.  Every moment Kelsi spends with her mom is spent as though it would be her last.

I was blown away when God revealed this to me.  Jesus is all-knowing, all-powerful, omniscient, and omnipresent.  He created everything including you.  Yet when he sees us, it's not through judgmental eyes wondering why we act this way.  He sees us with eyes of acceptance like a child.  He wants every moment that you will give him.  And like with our children, every moment you give Him will never be wasted.  But we can't stop here.

This is also how God want's us to look at and accept others.  He wan'ts us to ignore flaws as though we can't see them.  He wants us to forgive trespasses like he forgives us.  He wants us to give like we own it all anyway.

God loves us so incredibly much.  He desires a personal relationship with all of us.  He want's to be with you at home and at work, not just at church.

God loves you and I do too!

John Knight

What Dad's and Husbands want to say

As a father and husband, I too often don't have the words to express my feelings.  It's too easy to get caught up in budgets, work, chores, activities, and everything else that I let steal my attention.  I have a very loving family and they are very accepting of my shortcomings because they love me.  They deserve better.  

Today, while listening to "106.7 The Light", I heard something that every husband and father wishes they could convey to their wife and daughters.  This is my message to my family.

Kim, Kassi, Kalli, and Kelsi this is for you.  Watch the video below to see what I want you to hear from me every day.  I love you!!

You are AWESOME!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWi5iXnguTU

God loves you and I do too!!
John Knight

The Treasure Chest

I heard something on the radio yesterday that brought back some memories.  I don't know if all doctors are like mine was when I was a kid, but when I was a kid there was a treasure chest at the end of the hall at Maryville Pediatric.  I went to Dr. Marmon when I was a kid.  He was great and I wasn't afraid of him at all but I still, I didn't want to go to the doctor.  There was one thing that always made life better at the doctor....The treasure chest.  

No matter how sick I was and no matter how many shots I had to have, I knew if I was tough I would be able to pick a toy out of the treasure chest.  How I loved going through the treasure chest.  As a young boy, it seemed like there was a thousand toys in that chest.  And I had my pick of each and every one.  As we drove for what seemed like hours to the doctor all I could think about was what toys may be in the chest.  When I sat in the waiting room and another kid would come out with his awesome treasure, I prayed that it wasn't the last one.  The treasure chest provided me with hope; hope that no matter what happened, everything would be OK once I got my toy.

I rarely went to the doctor when I was a kid; once or twice a year if that.  I had a great childhood filled with football, eating, and playing.  But sometimes something went wrong and I had to go to the doctor.

As christians, we have our own treasure chest in Jesus Christ, in Heaven, in the hope of seeing our Heavenly Father face to face some day.  In this journey of life that we are on, many days are great and we get to bask in the Grace of the Father without grief or worry.  But then there are days when worry and grief clouds our eyes to the point that we can't see our hope.  There are also times of chastisement and reprovement when God has to teach us something in order that we grow.  Do you know what I mean?   It's during those times that we need to remember that Jesus has provided us a treasure chest at the end or our visit.  If you are a Christian then you have the hope and the promise of eternal life.  As a matter of fact, Jesus Himself is preparing a place for us in His Father's house.  In fact, He said in John 14:1-3:

“Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me.

In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there you may be also."

Since dad died, saying that my heart has been troubled is an understatement.  I'm sad, I miss my dad.  But God is good, so good!  In my time of trouble He reminds me of the great promise that He made to me.  He lets me know that dad is digging in his proverbial treasure chest in heaven now.  Some day, I'll get to visit my treasure chest with Jesus.  But more that that!  He reminds me that there will be moments in life that will try us, but at the end of each trial, if we are brave and do what is right, there will be a treasure chest where He will reward us.  Our treasure on earth, if nothing else is hope.

God wants you to know that you have hope.  Even if you think there is none, there is hope.  So with that, I say hold on.  Hold on and never give up because Jesus loves you so very much.  He died for you.

God loves you and I do too!!
John

My Dad...

For the past 12 days I've wanted to write a new post to my blog so badly.  But each time I've thought about it all that would have came out is pure emotion, the kind that just comes off as being a whiner or victim or attention-getter and that's not who I am.  As most of you know, my dad died on 10/25/13. 

If you didn't know my dad and you spent some time with him, you would have thought that he was a bit harsh, sometimes rude, but always joyful.  I know that sounds like an odd combination but my dad was a simple man.  So simple, in fact, that he just didn't know better than to tell you what was on his mind.  He didn't mean anything by it, he just thought that the unadulterated truth was best.  Once you knew this is how dad was, it was enlightening to his behaviors.

You see, mostly what was on dad's mind was Jesus and he was going to tell you about it.  Dad loved Jesus with all of his heart.  He was so thankful that God had healed him from cancer (dad was cancer-free when he died, he died from a brain bleed).  Anyone dad met, he told them about his miracle.  If he knew you didn't go to church he would tell you that you need to go to church.  If he thought you may not be a Christian, he would ask you if you were going to heaven or not.

Dad is the only person that I've known to not have an agenda in his relationships.  What I mean is that he didn't love people expecting a benefit.  He had no ill will or malice in his heart so he just assumed no one else did either.  Dad taught me how to give people the benefit of the doubt.  

You had to be close to dad to understand this but dad just loved.  He loved every person that walked through his door because he knew they had came to see him.  He often cried when I got there and cried when I left.  Not because he was sad but because he was so happy to see me.  We enjoyed each other's company and we talked a lot but often we just sat.  So often, we (not just me but my brother Jody and our wives) would just sit.  Dad would sometimes doze off for a few minutes and when he woke up he would always say "I wasn't asleep, I was just resting my eyes".  We loved to watch football together.  We are both huge UT and Cowboy fans.  No matter how good or how bad our teams were, we loved watching them together....together.  If UT got down by as much as a touchdown, you could be guaranteed that dad would say "It's over, UT is beat".  Kim and I always got a good laugh out of that.

I miss my dad.  A couple of people have asked me if I would bring him back from heaven if I could.  To their surprise I said YES!!!  Are you kidding?  I would absolutely bring him back if I could.  Oh yeah, he would be mad at me because I took him away from Jesus but the way I look at it, he would get to go back.  I want him here with me.  I want one more fishing trip with him.  I want to hear him say "We're gonna catch us a whampus" one more time.  I'd like one more heaping bowl of ice cream with him.  Just one more time, I'd like to look at him sitting in his Lazy-Boy with his dog on his lap and him say to me in the most sincere voice "love you son".

I love you dad, see you soon.

John

Pretty Woman

Who would have thought that I could have been inspired by Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman?  Pretty Woman is one of my wife's favorite movies and when she stumbled onto it this week she had to watch it.  What stood out to me was a moment in the film when Richard Gere was telling her how pretty and smart she was.  Then, he said something like he didn't understand why she couldn't see it.  She said "it's easier to believe the bad". 

That one statement spoke volumes to me.  As a father with three daughters, I'm always conscience of my daughter's self-esteem.  My wife is so very good at watching out for their self-esteem.  I try to say the right things but I just don't measure up to her.  We are fortunate to have three beautiful (inside and out) girls.  But I can't help to think about all of the pretty girls that I knew in high school that thought they were ugly.  Back then, I just wrote it off and assumed they just said that so they would hear someone tell them "you're not ugly, you're pretty".  Now that I'm older I can look back and see, based on the way some of them made decisions, they really did think they were ugly.

After all these years of Dateline reports, news reports, and other studies that I've been exposed to, mostly common sense stuff I guess, low self-esteem can cause a young woman to do things that aren't very Godly.  Low self-esteem is a tool that the devil uses against our teens to deceive them into making very bad decisions.  How many teenage girls have you known that have made some really bad decisions involving a boy that just didn't make sense?  I'll go out on a limb and say 99% of those bad decisions are because of low self-esteem.  Why?  Why does someone that is so pretty need to feel accepted by a boy so badly that they will do anything to win his approval?

The fact is that the devil will use one single thing to tear a teenager down.  For some reason, no matter how much good that has been said about you and to you, it only takes one bad thing to shake your self-esteem.  Like Julia Roberts said "it's easier to believe the bad".   That's why, as a parent, we MUST tell our children how good, pretty, or smart they are.  Starting from the day our kids can understand what we say we must give them positive reinforcement.  Because there is going to come a day when some immature boy or girl tells them "you’re not as pretty as you think you are" or they aren't going to win the starting position that they've worked so hard for.  You can be guaranteed that there will be times that will shake your child's self-esteem.  It happened to me and I bet it happened to you.  When that time comes, will there be enough good that it makes it at least harder to believe the bad?

Dad's, your daughters HAVE to know (not just think or wonder) that you think they are the prettiest girl alive.  They have to know that you believe in them.  Mom and Dad, they have to know that when the chips are down, they have parents they can go to who will help them and pray with them.  You must teach them what it means to be "fearfully and wonderfully made" Psalms 139:14.  I know it's hard but we have to teach them that God's acceptance is the only acceptance that they need.  Dad's, I know it's hard for us to pay compliments sometimes.  I don't know why, it just is.  But for your children's sake, we must do a better job of complimenting them.

And above all, pray, pray, pray.  Build a hedge of prayer around your children to help protect them from the bad that the devil is going to send their way.

I love you and God does too!

She thinks we're just fishin

Kassi

Kelsi

Kalli

Over the years, I have had four really good fishing buddies. Although dad and I fished some when I was a kid, I was more concerned with football than fishing. So really, Kim was the first person to really turn me on to fishing. Since that day on Fontana when I got hooked (pun intended), I have loved to fish. God has blessed me with a big pond in my front yard so I get to go anytime I want to. The really fun thing though is when one of my girls goes with me.

Kim was my original fishing buddy (and is still the prettiest) but once Kassi could hold a fishing pole, she would come out and fish with daddy. She once caught a Blue Gill with only a hook, no bait!  Kassi stuck with it for a little while but once basketball came along, she kinda lost interest in fishing. Then came Kalli. I gotta give credit where credit is due, Kalli has been my good-luck-charm fishing buddy. For some reason, I always caught more fish with her than with anybody. Kalli would also handle the fish more than most girls would. And now, there is Kelsi. She is going to be a really good fishing buddy. She started last year but she really couldn't manage her sponge-bob fishing pole then. This year, she is holding her own.  She is the most patient out of all of my fishing buddies.

Last night, she caught her first fish and I wish I could have caught her reaction on video. She was so excited, once she could see the fish at the bank she almost through her pole down.  She actually froze she was laughing so hard.

Over the years, I've had a lot of nice evenings with my girls just fishin. I'd love to tell you some emotional, tear jerking story like Trace Atkins' song 'she thinks we're just fishin' but I don't know if I have any. What I do know is that when we go fishing, shoot basketball, throw softball, play with Lego's, go swimming, or whatever we do together, I'm fulfilling God's word by bringing my kids up the way that they should go. I'm letting them know that they are important. They know that dad is busy with work and chores but I always should let them know that I'm not too busy for them.

I'd love to tell you that my years have including hundreds or thousands of evenings spending quality time with my daughters but unfortunately, that would be a lie. Fact is, I'm an imperfect father. I tend to get caught up in the "rules" and "discipline" side of fatherhood and I let mom focus on the "loving" and "nurturing" side. But as a Christian father, it is so important for us to truly live one day at a time. Yes, we have to plan for the future but some day, she's not going to be my little girl, she's going to be my young lady, then she's going to be my grown woman.  

When my little girls are grown what have I taught them? Right now, who cares! Life's lessons will happen on their own, we don't have to make them happen. I just need to make sure that when they do happen, I'm there to help and to love them. I have to make sure that my girls will trust me and know that I care.

I hope you take time to cherish those "little" moments with your kids. They are the moments that they don't recognize today as being significant but someday they wouldn't take a million dollars for them. I know I'll always cherish my time at the pond with each of my girls and if I play my cards right, some day, they will too.

Live for Jesus completely today so that tomorrow you won't regret what you did yesterday.

I love you and God does too!

Happy Birthday Little Brother!!

Regret!!!  Life is full of it.  In it's simplest form, regret is just the mindset of wishing you would have done something different, usually because of the outcome of a decision.  I try to teach my children to not have regret in life because it is very hard to fix.

My life is full of regret; I wish I would have tried harder in school, I wish I would have been closer to my grand parents whom are all dead now, I wish I would have insisted on playing Line-Backer full time instead of Defensive End, I wish I would have had short hair, I wish I would have tried contacts sooner, I wish I would have taken my relationship with God seriously, I wish I would have maintained friendships...... I think you get the picture.

Now what does all of this have to do with wishing my brother (Jody Knight) a Happy Birthday?  Well its simple, I have a lot of regret when it comes to the way I handled our relationship as children.  Anyone who knows us knows that we have completely different personalities and we always have since birth.  Basically, his personality was good and mine was bad.  I loved my brother but I was jealous of him because he was "cuter" or "nicer" than I was.  When you couple that jealousy with the fact that I was mean , I was more of a bully than a brother much of the time.  

Now don't get me wrong, we had a lot of fun.  We played football, baseball, and Nerf-hoop in our bedroom all the time and we played in the woods, swung on muscadine vines, played in the creek in the woods, went swimming, and rode our bikes a lot.  But for anyone who has ever been in a bad relationship, the memories that tend to stand out aren't the good ones, its the bad.  It would be too easy for me to tell too much about the negative so I think that I will just leave it at "I was mean to my brother, too mean".

After all these years I love my brother very much and I always have.  I have always been very proud of him.  I have the utmost respect for my brother.  He was a great athlete in school, he was was always smarter than me, and he beat me at every video game we ever played.  Now, he is a strong, reliable, Christian man.  He is a loving husband and loving father.  Like me, he isn't perfect but I think he is a lot closer than I am.  I've done what I know to do to let him know that I love him and I know that he knows that I love him.  The problem is that word "regret".  I just can't help but wonder how things would be today (for both of us and our families) if I would have let the love of Christ overshadow my relationship with my brother.

And you?  Do you have any regret like me?  You can't go back and undo what has been done but you can ask for forgiveness and then move on. Maybe you were on the other end of the stick and you are harboring hard feelings because of the way you were treated.  You must forgive.  

Regret isn't healthy but it is a fact.  All we can do is live our lives from this point on with no regret.  If you live today completely for Jesus, then tomorrow, you won't regret what you did yesterday.

I love you and God does too!

Childlike Faith

Well its been a while since I've posted anything.  OK, its been forever ago.  After my last post about my dad my emotions were just way too deep.  Although I enjoy sharing on this blog, there are just some things that I prefer to keep private and after much discussion with Kim I decided that I'd hold off for a while.

Back to Childlike faith...

I was talking to Kim last night about dad's faith.  Kim made the comment "your dad has such great faith" and he does.  I truly wished that I had his faith but I have yet to concur my cynicism, skepticism, and pessimism to have that great of faith.  But after thinking about it and trying to figure out why I don't have the faith that he does it really just boils down to one thing....TRUST!

Dad, like a child, trusts in God.  The Bible tells him "ask and ye shall receive" (Matt 7:7, Matt 21:22), "if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven." (Matt 18:18-20), and "Therefore I say to you whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." (Mark 11:24).  

When we put our hands on a loved one and pray, do we think; "I hope God heals them" or "I can't wait to see God heal them"?  I know which one that I unfortunately lean toward.  Jesus said “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven." (Matt 18:3).  This is a very broad statement but it is as simple as Christ was saying it...to adults; "your children trust in you, you must trust in Me" is what Jesus was saying.

My dad has this kind of trust and faith.  And his reward?  He has been cancer free since the tumor was removed in December.  I specifically spoke with two neurosurgeons that both believed that even after the tumor was removed, he would only have 12 months to live and that he would probably start deteriorating after 6 months.  Dad has had one clean MRI and he finds out the results of the second tomorrow.  His statement to Kim was "I don't know why they keep wasting their time and mine because they aren't going to find anything".  That's faith.

Find ways to practice your faith, that's right, practice.  The bible is quite plain that we are all given the same "measure of faith" (Rom 12:3).  It's up to us to learn how to use it through practice and prayer.

God loves you and I do too!

I want to be like him

By reading this, I'm sure you know that my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor Tuesday night. Since then, I've spent a lot of time with him and the rest of my family. My brother, Jody, has hardly left his side. While I have been with him, I've paid close attention to him. I've come to many conclusions over the past few days but one is resonating with me right now. No matter how old I get, I want to be like my dad when I grow up.

When I was a boy, I thought my dad drove a train because he worked at ALCOA where all the train tracks were. I thought that was awesome. So when I grew up, I wanted to be like my dad and drive a train.

When I was 8 or 9 years old, we lost power in a storm. We had a well for water so if there was no electricity there was no water. If there was no water, we couldn't flush commodes. Once the sun went down, this was a precarious situation for me because I did not want to go up in the woods to use the bathroom because it was dark and I was afraid. Not dad. When he needed to go, he took off and didn't even take a flash light. He wasn't scared one bit. When I grew up, I wanted to be just like my dad because he wasn't afraid of anything.

As I became a teen, I would meet people that my dad worked with. Sometimes they would say, "there isn't a more honest man than John Knight. I hope you're as honest as he is". Or they would tell me some story about how dad worked out a difficult situation with the Union at ALCOA and would say "you're lucky if you're as smart as your dad". But my favorite and the one used most often was when they would always say "Oh! your John's boy. If you grow up to be half the man your dad is you will be a good man". So when I grew up, I wanted to be like my dad because he was a good man.

Today I watched a man, stricken with a brain tumor pray for the preacher that was praying for him. Today, I watched my dad give thanks to God because no matter what, he knows that God will take care of him. I watched as he witnessed to every nurse and doctor that came in his room. When I grow up, I want to be like my dad, I want to be someone that is NEVER ashamed or scared to talk about Jesus to anyone.

As I type this blog, my dad and I are listening to a CD of my mom singing and Betty Bowman playing the piano. Right as I thought he was asleep, he raised up and as he cried happy tears he said:

"Son, I love that woman! Listen to that voice, have you ever heard anything more beautiful in your life? We've been together for nearly 50 years and we've had our struggles; some my fault and some her fault, but through it all, we are more in love today than we have ever been. I love your mother so much, I could never make it without her. Just listen to her. There is nothing more beautiful to my ears as your mother's voice, listen".

With that, he laid back and just listened. I want to be able to look back at nearly 50 years of marriage and say "through it all, we are more in love today than ever". When I grow up, I want to be just like my dad.

I love you and God does too!!

It's a tumor, now what God?

Got the worst news of my 41 years yesterday. My dad has been feeling poorly lately and it turns out he has a brain tumor (9.5 cm X 5.5 cm X 6.7 cm). The doctor believes it is a very new tumor, only 3 - 4 weeks old, but it is already a stage IV tumor
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cancer_staging). Without going into detail, you can already tell this isn't good.

Bad things happen to good people every day so I'm not asking why. My dad is saved so we aren't worried about the ever-after. But this is my dad. Remember my post "go son, go!!"? I love my dad, and now looking at him in the hospital bed I don't ask God why. But I do ask, "now what?" I'm praying, my family is praying, our friends are praying, RIO-180 is praying, the RIO network is praying, Broadway Baptist is praying, Redemption Christian Center is praying.....we're all praying for my dad. But now what?

I was just being honest with God this morning in prayer and told him "God, this isn't a matter of whether You can or can't. It's a matter of whether You will or won't". God said that He will have mercy on whoever he wishes (Rom 9:18). If God heals dad, we're going to praise Him and if He doesn't, we're going to praise Him. But still, I come back to, "now what"?

At this point, all I know to do is to pray and trust God. If you read this, please pray for John Knight. He is 67 and a Godly man. He loves his wife dearly. He adores his children and grandchildren. Although he is ready to meet God, he doesn't want to do it soon.....I don't want him to either.

I love you and God does too!!

Daddy's little Girl

Early this week when I took Kassi to school, I dropped her off at Mary Blount Elementary. When we left our house on Bingham Lane, we kissed Kim and my baby Kalli goodbye. As I walked Kassi into Kindergarten, we talked about all the fun things she would do that day. She gave me a big kiss and a big hug when we got to her class room.

When I got home from work, Kim and I sat at the dinner table with my 6 year-old Kassi and my 17 month old Kalli. Kassi told us about her day. I asked if she had any boyfriends and she said "daddy, I'll never have a boyfriend because I'm going to marry you when I grow up". At this moment, if you were in my mind, you could hear the loud sound of screeching tires coming to an abrupt stop in my head. THAT WASN'T LAST WEEK!!! THAT WAS 10 YEARS AGO!!!

Oh my how time flies. It really does seem like yesterday that my kids were so young. Now, Kassi is 16 and Kalli is 11 and we brought Kelsi into the mix a couple of years ago. It still amazes both Kim and me that we a) have three kids b) one of them is 16 and c) one of them is 2. An 11 year-old maybe, surely we are the right age for an 11-year old. But I feel way to young for a 16 year-old and way too old for a two year-old.

It seems like just early this week, I didn't have to worry about Kassi dating because she was going to marry me and live with Kim and me forever. I know that was just early this week, had to be. Last night, reality sunk in as Kassi and I sat watching her boyfriend play football. When did this happen??!! Early this week, it seemed like my worries about Kassi were "I hope the other kids don't make fun of her for being too tall", "Kassi is a loner, I hope she learns to make friends", "I hope the teacher is good to her", and "I hope she talks to other kids about Jesus". My worries have changed significantly. Now my worries are "I hope Kassi stays away from boys", "I hope Kassi stays away from boys", "I hope Kassi stays away from boys"...I think you get the picture.

The fact is that as Kassi grows up, she is not going to stay away from boys. She is a beautiful, smart young woman and the boys have noticed that. So my focus as a father has changed over the years from "Boy bad, ball good" to "I must pick the right Husband for Kassi. I know you're thinking that I'm crazy for saying that I'm gong to pick her husband and in that sense, you're right. However, when I say that I'm going to pick her husband I mean that it is up to me to see to it that that she only date appropriate suitors.

I want my daughters to marry a man of God and I will do everything in my power to see to that. He must be a man, not that he has to be 6'3" and 225 lbs and can bench press 400 lbs. That isn't the definition of a man. A man, first and foremost, is a man of God. This means he is a protector, provider, leader and a teacher. He must be Godly and holy. He must put God ahead of everything.

Any boy that wants to date my daughter must not only live up to my standards but to God's standards. He will come to the door each time to pick my daughter up and he will come inside to speak with me. He will not wait in his car. He will open doors for my daughter. He will speak to her as though I were standing over them during every conversation. He will read his bible and be prepared for conversations with me about what he has been reading. He will only touch her in a way that he would as if I were with them. He will not use foul or vulgar language. He will not use alcohol or drugs. He will not associate with people that do use alcohol or drugs.

Fathers, it is our responsibility for our daughters to know what a man of God looks like. Does your daughters see you do any of the things on my list that I would not allow a boy to do to my daughter? Do they see you do the things that I said the boy should do? You want to know what kind of husband your daughter may end up with? Look at yourself. If you have a good relationship with your wife and daughter, she is going to want to marry someone like you, good bad or indifferent. Because lets face it, every little girl wants to marry her daddy when she grows up.

I love you and God does too!

Love and Babe Ruth

I ripped off Dennis Rainey yesterday so I thought I would do it again today.  Here is something that I read last month and it has resonated with me ever since.  One of my favorite scriptures is 1 Pet 4:8 "Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins".  I know in my life and my marriage, I have counted on the love of others toward me to cover my sins to offer forgiveness so I try to be careful to do the same.  The story below from Mr. Rainey is a great example of what Jesus was talking about when he said we must accept the Kingdom of Heaven like a child (Matt 18:2-5).
 
I can’t attribute this story to its source, but a number of years ago I read a story about Babe Ruth. At the end of his legendary baseball career, the Babe had become obviously overweight. During one of his final contests, he bungled several fly balls in the outfield and struck out weakly with every plate appearance. Fans who had seen or heard about his once-proud exploits were now quick with catcalls, mocking this man who had hit twice as many home runs as anyone else in baseball.

But as the jeering got louder and louder, a little boy leaped over the railing and onto the playing field. With tears streaming down his face, he ran to the Babe and threw his arms around the legs of the fading athlete. Babe Ruth reached down, picked up the boy and hugged him tight. Then setting him down and patting him on the head, they walked hand in hand toward the dugout, while the jeers turned to cheers. Hardly an eye remained dry in the whole place.

The crowd had been correct in their assessment, of course. The Babe had let much of his athletic prowess go to seed. Yet a little boy had remembered him for who he was . . . and had covered over his errors with love.

This is not unlike what marriage was established to be -- two people saying to each other, "I know you've failed me and disappointed me at times (as I have you), but I'm still going to put my arm around you and tell you, 'I love you.'  i'm on this journey with you one way or the other."

Love covers a multitude of sins...Period!  It isn't pride and it isn't something you earn.  God is Love (1 John 4:8) and this love allows us to forgive.  Love allows us to over look someones mistakes and see them for who God sees them.  God's love is what allows me to see my kids and my wife the way that Jesus sees them.  Like I said to Kassi yesterday, my nature is for everything to be black and white, no gray area.  It is God's love working in me that helps me to get past my human nature and see my family the way God sees them.  It's God's love that lets me know that God has laid hold of (apprehended) them for a reason (Phil 3:12) and I should always do the same.

Judge not lest ye be judged (Matt 7:1)

I love you and God does too!

Foul Ball

The aricle below is taken directly from what I read this morning in my family life devotional (familylife.com) by Dennis Rainey.  This is something I am guilty of more often than I care to admit.  I'm sure I was guilty of it today when I was asking my daughter why she had to go outside to get her backpack.  Wouldn't life be easier if you just pick your "stuff" up when you get out of the car was my comment to her. 

Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise.
Ephesians 5:15

I've often wondered why more people don't get hurt by foul balls that are hit into the stands during a baseball game. You'd think it would happen almost every time, especially those line drives that carom through an entire seating section. But even on those occasions when a stray ball does leave a lump or a bruise, you can hardly blame the batter, can you? I mean, he's not out to intentionally harm anyone. It's just what happens in the flow of the game, right?

That's probably not the way Baltimore Orioles' Jay Gibbons felt not long ago when he fouled a pitch straight back over the screen. That's because this time, his wayward swing didn't threaten a nine-year-old sitting there with his cap and glove or a hot-dog vendor walking the steps or a pair of buddies taking in a game together.

No, Jay's foul ball hit his own wife right in the ribcage.

He didn't mean to. It wasn't intentional.

This story reminded me of those sarcastic remarks we sometimes let slip.

Or those little unkind things we foul off. Or those grunts we utter when we think the magazine article we're reading is much more interesting and important than what the wife is saying.

A foul ball can hurt as much as a direct hit. A fairly insignificant slight or accusation--especially when it's allowed to fester and accumulate and build on the last one--can bruise your relationship. That's why you must guard against minor, offhand offenses. Stop occasionally and go see if your words are hurting anyone--your spouse, a child or a friend.

Careless words. A lapse in judgment. Foul balls. And foul words. But whether intended or not, they can still carom with enough speed to wound and injure the ones you love the most.

Be careful with your words and choose your battles wisely.  Those we love are more important than being right all the time.

I love you and God does too!